An Open Letter To My Best Friend’s Fiancé

Joseph,

I remember a time when Samantha came to me and told me she was going on a date with you. We had both been openly dating so to me, it was just another war story for us to discuss later; but I could tell there was an extra pep in her step this time. I obviously made fun of her because we are both a little skeptical when it comes to love. We both love the idea of love but our choices in men made us skeptical that it even existed at all. Buuuut here she was getting all googly-eyed over you and eating all the words she had ever said to me. Deep down (waaaaay deep down), we’ve always known that we’re hopeless romantics (probably me more than her) but we just needed to find the right man to ignite the light for us again.

All of a sudden you were taking her on country drives and moving in together and she knew that I would say she was moving too fast; but also to be careful and remember to take her rose-colored glasses off every now and then. The two of you made it official and I was so happy because she knows exactly what she wants and she won’t settle for less, so that automatically meant you had all the pre-requisites. There were plenty of guys who caught her attention but never quite had what you have.

Months later, you were still around and I was surprised because she’s very  kind of hard to handle – I would know, we’re basically the same person. Over time, as her feelings for you intensified, mine also evolved. I went from simply believing you were some nice guy to appreciating you on so many levels simply because she loves you. But I’ve also been carefully watching you because her heart is now in your hands. I can honestly say that I’m not as afraid anymore because I’ve seen you take extra care of my friend and all the fear has melted away. She’s finally in good hands. 

My friendship with Samantha was a whirlwind just as your romance with her has been. We met at James Avery and before you knew it, we were the best of friends; it was like we’d known each other our entire lives. We call each other soul mates but you are her real soul mate because as things continue to progress, you will know her on intimate levels that I will never reach. She will share milestones with you that best friends do not share; she will tell you secrets that I will never hear; you will develop inside jokes that will never make sense to me; but all of that is okay because I’ve already had her companionship. I’ve witnessed her love, her anger, her generosity, her stubbornness, her mania during football season, her fears, her joys, her frustrations, her laughter and her tears; we, too, have inside jokes and secrets that we will never speak of.

Although her and I don’t talk every day, I know that you have knocked down the wall that surrounded her heart. She finds you in everything she does, not because she has to but because you have truly made her happy – no holds barred. She has changed so much in the way she offers me advice when I come to her with my male problems. She’s not so cynical anymore! Misery loves company so at first I was taken aback, but she knows that I’m the most hopeless romantic there is so she’s slowly helping me have a new perspective with relationships.

While you’ve grown to know her and love her, remember to never take her for granted. Remember that this is a partnership. She doesn’t need someone to tell her what to do but to guide her; we both know she can handle her own. Continue to put her in her place (I know she needs this a lot) and continue to learn something new about her every day. This is new territory for this cynical  woman and that terrifies her; there’s still a part of her that is afraid you will hurt her. So learn her new thoughts, new fears, new joys, new worries, new domestic accomplishments (I know that one’s been quite the journey) and always reassure her that your love for her is endless. You are now her top priority. Her heart is entirely yours now.

I’ve said this so much to her and I’ll say write this to you: I’m ecstatic for this new journey that you will begin. I’m rooting for y’all because I love you both dearly but also because it’s secretly giving me hope that one day I will find the happiness you’ve given her. Remember, her and I are the same stubborn, crazy, generous, hopeful girls so if she can find you, I know my time will eventually come.

But also remember this: if you hurt her in any capacity, I will chop your balls off. 

Love you both,

Her Best Friend

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